Mother's Day

This year, Dan really out did himself with Mother's Day. It was exceptional. On Saturday, he made me take the whole day off. He kicked me out of the house and noon and wouldn't let me come back until after dinner. So, I went to lunch with my good friend, Jeanette, and then we shopped for a while downtown. That was a lot of fun. It's always nice to just sit and chat and do some girly things. After I dropped her off, I went to the px and wandered around for a bit, bought myself some sandals, and then got a pedicure. My friend, heather, met up with me afterwards and we had dinner. Love her. That was also so much fun cause we just sat and talked without any kid interruptions. When I did finally come home, the kids were already bathed and in bed and Dan was baking brownies. No joke. 

Here's the story about the brownies:

In every ward/branch we've ever been in, the elders quorum does something great for Mother's Day, but this branch wasn't doing anything, so Dan took it upon himself to make food for all the women. He enlisted to help of the young men and Tim wood, so together they made lots of yummy treats and hanji crafts to hand out to the mothers. It was super sweet of them and we all loved being able to be together for relief society and enjoy food that was prepared for us. 

Seriously, I have the sweetest husband in the world. 

On Sunday, evie and Dan brought me breakfast in bed and Dan did EVERYTHING to get the kids ready so that I could just relax. I took a long shower and did my hair fancy and everything. It was glorious. After church, he took the kids on a walk so I could take a nap and then he made dinner. 

I don't know what I ever did to deserve him, but I'm sure happy he chose me. 

I am so blessed to be a mother to two amazing children. I could not be happier that Heavenly Father trusted me to raise these sweet spirits, and I'm trying my best everyday to make sure they know how much they are loved. 

5 years

 For the man who works the hardest, laughs the most, and makes me so happy every single day of my life. Marrying Dan five years ago was absolutely the best decision I've ever made.

 I thought I loved Dan in 2008 when we were dating

 And then we got engaged, and I was sure I loved him then

 But it was nothing compared to how much I loved Dan after we got married.

 And after one year of marriage, my love for him had multiplied.

 When we had Evelyn, my love multiplied again. Exponentially.

And again when we had Emmett. It's amazing how much more you love your spouse after you have a child. Just keeps multiplying.

So, after 5 years, I know better. I love Dan more now than ever before, but now I know that my love for this wonderful man still has room to grow. I can't wait to see what the next 5 years have in store for us and how much more I will love him then. Happy anniversary, Dan. I am so lucky to have you in my life.

Fun date

Dan and I went on a date tonight, and our plan was to just go downtown and find somewhere that has English on the menu and eat there. So after probably 15 minutes of wandering around, we found this little park type place in the middle of a crowded street and decided to stop. We heard music and saw all this pretty scenery and wanted to investigate further. 

At first we thought we stumbled into a little concert and patted ourselves on the backs for being so lucky. There were a bunch of singers singing lots of popular songs, like the sound of music and rent, in Korean, which was super fun to listen to. This one lady sang I will always love you by Whitney Houston, in English I might add, and did a fantastic job. Whoever was running this shindig gave both Dan and I these blinking light lanterns and little flags to wave around, so bonus right? And then the concert stopped and they started talking instead. 

We have no idea what they were saying, obviously, but all the sudden people were waving flags and chanting things, so we decided it was time to bolt. The only problem was that we are American. Which means everyone around us noticed us. No blending in there. And to add insult to injury, the 4-5 tv cameras that were there filming this event kept flashing over to us for our reactions. Um.... Yay? 

Eventually the crowd started to break up and we thought, "this is our chance", so we turn to leave, only to find out that the group has turned into a march/parade and now we are in the front. We are pretty confused about we stumbled on at this point and would just like to be gone, but there's no clear exit strategy. Especially when you have a lit up, blinking lantern with you. We did eventually find another exit from that park down a little alley and we bolted. After a couple blocks, we dropped our lanterns and flags contraband and took off at a run. Never know if they're following you. Did we just join a cult? Not sure. We gotta stop doing that on dates (jk obviously). 

After a lot more walking, we stopped at dos tacos to eat. Who would've thought there was a little Mexican joint in downtown daegu, South Korea? And it was actually pretty darn good, except it had super small portions. So after we ate our wee Mexican dinner, we walked around even more trying to find a subway entrance. And that's when we found heaven. On one of the streets there was a little crepes shop where they make these seriously enormous crepes and fill them with whip cream, chocolate syrup, fruit, and ice cream. They even had some that they put a whole piece of cheesecake inside of. What!? Then they fold it and roll it so it looks like your eating a ice cream cone. But you're not! It's a crepe filled with ice cream and fruit. Let me tell you, it was delicious! I'm going to have dreams about that crepe. Then we took the subway home and bought some fish shaped, deep fried, donut like, cream and bean paste filled goodies that we ate on the walk back to base. All in all, it was a seriously fun night. 

some thoughts

 

I know this amazing woman who is going through some really trying times right now, and I've been thinking a lot about her and how strong she has always been. She's always so open about her trials, hoping that maybe her experiences can help someone else, which is so different from me. I am an extremely private person and have a really hard time opening up to people and really saying how I feel. I'm an expert at putting on a brave face and just pretending like I'm okay, when in reality, I am anything but okay. So, this amazing woman that I know, has inspired me. I think it will do me a lot of good to write some things down, and if I'm lucky, maybe I can help someone else out in the process.

Marriage is hard. And it takes a lot of work. I knew that going in, and everyone tells you that before you get married, but I don't know that I actually KNEW that until recently. Dan and I have always been a dream team, no bragging, just the truth. We don't fight, we don't really disagree on much, and most of the time we just have a lot of fun because our sense of humor and temperaments are so similar. But, since we've been here, I feel like our relationship has been put through the ringer. From the minute we got off the plane in Osan, Dan has been pulled in a million different directions and has been busy, busy, busy. Which means that our little family has been coming in second. They didn't give him a week to in process like they were supposed to, but instead immediately threw him into work and told him to just get it done. How was he supposed to get those things done if he's not in the system, has never done any of this Army administrative stuff before, and there's no one around to tell him how to do it?

It's been rough. For the first 2 months or so, Dan would come home and just be silent and cranky all evening until we went to bed because he was so stressed from work. I tried hard to be understanding and supportive, but there's only so much a person can take before they snap. So, one day I finally snapped. I was mean and belligerent, and he was cranky and stressed, so our house was not a happy one.

We would still try and go on dates every weekend, but you could tell that we weren't really enjoying ourselves. Sometimes Dan would say some flippant comment about something that would seriously hurt my feelings, because I was being overly sensitive, and then I wouldn't talk to him the rest of the evening. Super mature, I know.

We never sat down and talked about anything, but instead we were passive aggressive and mostly just ignored one another. I don't know why I let this go on for so long, but I guess I was being prideful and wanted him to admit that it was his fault that we were so unhappy. There was even some talk of me taking the kids and going to live with my mom for a little while, until things slowed down a bit for him.

But one day while I was cleaning the house and the kids were napping, my best friend called me and I started to just vent and cry and rage at her until I was empty inside. And through all the ranting, she was super supportive and listened to what I had to say, and even backed me up on a lot of things, but at the end of the conversation she gave me some sound advice. She told me to just start doing nice things for him all the time. If he's so bothered by the dishes not being done, even though I felt like he should do them since I cook and take care of HIS children, she told me to just do them. Maybe I was right in feeling the way I did, but wouldn't it be better if I just did the dishes so he would be happy?

At the time, I was thinking there was no way I was going to do that because I was right. I was right, dangit, so he should have to be the one to do nice things for me, but after giving it a lot of thought, and praying a lot about us, I decided she was right. I started doing the dishes, and making him breakfast, and driving up to his work to bring him lunch. I would buy him kit kats at the store or make chocolate chip cookies for no reason, and the difference in everyone's attitude was palpable.

Dan and I started talking, really talking, to each other again. We started to actually enjoy our dates again instead of just going to dinner and coming home. After a while, Dan started doing nice things for me in return. Like, letting me go to lunch with a girlfriend for most of Saturday afternoon.

One night, we finally sat down and discussed what's going on. He told me how stressed he's been, and I told him how lonely I felt, and I cried a lot, and then we went to bed.

Things certainly aren't perfect or anything, and sometimes I still get very frustrated with him because I feel like he should be doing more to help me, but I am trying to be more selfless and more service oriented. Doing service for someone really does increase your love for that person, and in turn, it makes you a better person. People were always telling me that, and preaching this exact thing, but when you experience it first-hand, it makes it very real.

I heard this song on the radio the other day and decided this is exactly how I feel about Dan now. So, I sent him the lyrics via email.

It's not a walk in the park
To love each other.
But when our fingers interlock,
Can't deny, can't deny you're worth it

Cause after all this time.
I'm still into you

mother's day (i'm bragging a little)

This mother's day was pretty great, and it was all thanks to my wonderful husband. He took me to see Iron Man 3 yesterday, which was great because it's the first date we've had since Emmett was born. Plus, it was a really great movie. Then, this morning he made me breakfast in bed and gave me some gifts. To understand the significance of these two presents, we have to venture back in time a couple months.

A couple months ago, we went to Virginia Beach hoping to play some putt putt golf. The golfing didn't last very long because Evie got bored of it, so we walked around this souvenir shop for a while instead. While we were there, I found this super cute VA Beach picture frame and told Dan that eventually I wanted to buy one of those and take a picture at the beach to put in it, that way we would always remember that we lived here. Then, I promptly forgot about it. After that, I saw this super cute dress and commented on how much I liked it, but since I was pregnant I would never fit in it. Then I promptly forgot about that, too.

So, back to this morning. I open my presents and what should I find? That picture frame and that same dress. Well remembered, sir. It was touching to see how much thought he put into getting me something, but most especially it was touching to see that he really listens when I say things. Even meaningless, passing comments.

this is the dress. it's SUPER soft. wish you could feel it.

Dan also gave a talk in church today about mothers, which was just outstanding. I had to go out to the car and re-do my make up because I cried so much. I swear I was glowing from the inside out because I was so proud that he was my husband. Everyone should be jealous. He said some wonderful things about me and about his mother, and the whole thing was just phenomenal.

After Sacrament meeting, the young men went around and gave all the women some Godiva dark chocolate truffles. Yum. Then, all of relief society was spent chatting and eating yummy snacks.Not too shabby.

We ended the day by Dan making dinner and promising me a massage later.

Seriously, I could not feel more pampered or loved. What a wonderful day. I wanted to document it, in case I ever forget. What a great man I married, and what great children I have. I am so blessed.

I am also blessed to have such an amazing mother of my own. I wouldn't be who I am today without my mom, and words cannot express how much I love and appreciate her.

Alongside my mother, is my mother-in-law. Boy, did I win the lottery with her. I am so lucky to have a woman like her in my life and I love her more than I can say.

Happy mother's day to all you mothers and future mothers. It's the greatest job in the world. 

12/12/12

 If you weren't aware, yesterday was the day of 12. Dan kept saying it was the day of a century, so he took the whole day off and we celebrated.He and his brothers are kind of fanatics about the number 12, don't ask me why. I certainly don't have a favorite number, but to each his own. It was a lot of fun to have Dan home and it's always fun to celebrate something, so yesterday was awesome.

Dan stayed up the night before until 12:12 am. I did not.

 Dan woke up the next morning at 6 to go exercise, I obviously did not. I'm not crazy sauce unlike some.

Dan tried to run 2 miles in 12 minutes, but I'm not sure if he succeeded or not. I forgot to ask. Then he did 12 minutes of sit ups and push ups. He's motivated for sure. And attractive.

 Then, he read 12 pages of scripture.

We looked on Urbandspoon and found the 12th restaurant listed, which happened to be the egg bistro, so we decided to go for breakfast.

We had to get the 12th item on the menu, whatever that may be, but we each counted differently. He went vertically and I went horizontally, so we ended up with different breakfasts. Although, they were both eggs benedict and they were both delicious.

 Dan got one with tomatoes and feta cheese and whatnot, while I got the one with spinach, bacon, and hollandaise. Yum.

Next, we looked up the top things to do in Chesapeake and had to do number 12. Turns out it was our city park, and it was cold and rainy, so we just took a picture next to the sign.

Then we went to dollar tree and bought 12 items for $12. Evie had a blast.

We bought 12 donuts in the number 12 check out line.

And took a picture and 12:!2pm. Not a good picture in any way, but we were in a time crunch.

Dan played a nerdy video game and whatever he was doing had something to do with 12, but I have no idea what any of that meant, so I'm skipping it.

We wanted to see a movie in theater 12, but they only had 6 theaters, so we compromised. But, we got to go on a mini date in the afternoon, which was a lot of fun. Have you seen skyfall? I thought it was okay.

When we got home, we each donated a 12lb bag of old clothes. I'm pretty sure I could have donated 6 more of those.

And we finished the day by playing 12 games of mario kart.

Not bad, eh? It was such a fun day. I hope to have many more random holidays to celebrate in the future. This was all orchestrated by Dan, and I think he did an excellent job. What is the next random day we can celebrate, honey?

November

I love the month of November because it's the month of Thanksgiving, which means that all month long I get to reflect on what I am thankful for. My life is so incredibly blessed, so I have no end of things I am thankful for; from my family to hot water. As most people do this time of year, I am doing the thing where you say one thing you are thankful for every single day, which has been a lot of fun. When I start thinking about things I am thankful for, I start thinking about all my blessings, and sometimes it overwhelms me.

I can't believe how blessed I am. What have I ever done in my life to deserve what I have now? The more I count my blessings, the more I feel unworthy of having them all. I was thinking about this while I was sitting in church on Sunday and I just started crying. (Dang pregnancy hormones) I have the most amazing husband who loves me unconditionally, even when I'm sure I don't deserve it. He makes our marriage so fun and almost effortless, feeling, because he is so positive and humorous about things. I also have this adorable daughter who brings more joy into my life than I ever thought was possible. She brightens up rooms by her cute little personality and smiles, and I can't help but wonder at my good fortune that Heavenly Father would entrust her sweet little spirit to me. Knowing that makes me even more excited about this little boy in my belly.

I am thankful for my home, that we can come home and feel the spirit and be uplifted.
I am thankful for my country
I am thankful for the Army because they provide Dan with a stable job, which is more than most can say.
I am thankful for modern technology that helps me keep in touch with family.
I am thankful for my friends and family, without whom I would be lost.
I am thankful for the church and the absolute truth it provides.
I am thankful for the priesthood and the First Presidency.
I am thankful for forgiveness.
I am thankful for sweat pants (less serious, but just as important in my opinion)
....

The list could go on for days. So, count your blessings and I'm sure you, too, will be surprised.

Ariel, this is my respose

True Love. Does it exist? I think we all want to believe it does, and just like any girl, I love romantic movies when the two people end up together, but is that realistic? Probably not. True love isn't something you just stumble upon by accident. It's something that you work on every single day of your life. If you are looking to meet someone and immediately know that they are the one for you, I think you will be looking for a very long time. Isn't that why dating is so important? Of course there are certain people you are more attracted to or more drawn to, but is there really just one person out there for everyone? I'm inclined to say no. I think there were probably several men out there who could have made me happy and complimented me in lots of ways, but I chose Dan. I chose him for the man that he was and the man I knew he would become. I chose him for so many different reasons, but the point is that I CHOSE to be with him, which makes him my soul mate.

What if I had never met him? What if he had gone to another Vet school instead of K-State? I firmly believe that we both would have eventually found other people (though she would have been ugly, I'm sure) and would probably have been happy in that alternative life, but thankfully that did not happen.

People who know Dan and I would tell you that we are crazy compatible. I mean, it was obvious from the get go, at least to me. Almost disgusting really, but that doesn't last long. All those things I loved about Dan in the beginning are still there, but if that was all there was for the rest of eternity, I think the love would fade. Quickly. True love is choosing to love the other person no matter what, day in and day out, flaws and all.

It's doing the dishes and cleaning the house, changing the diapers, making dinner, and sending flowers. It's all of those things, just like you said Ariel. It's also being more concerned for their well being than your own. If you are both giving 100% all of the time to make the other person happy, how could you not have a happy marriage? It's the selfish people who are unhappy.

Those butterflies that I used to get when I saw Dan don't come around much anymore, and it's not because I love him any less. Just the opposite actually. I would say that the love you feel when dating someone is superficial, though powerful. Once you're married and sharing a life together it becomes something so much more. It's deeper, more powerful, and ultimately, more satisfying. Spending each and every day together, learning and growing, is what true love is all about.

You know that country song that goes something like, "and I thought I loved her then"? It's like that. I thought I loved Dan when I married him and didn't think it could get any better, and then we had our 1 year anniversary. I thought after that, there's no way I could love him any more, and then we had Evelyn. And on and on. I am looking forward to the next 30 years, because if the trend follows, I can't even imagine the amount of love I will have for that man by the end of them. 

And what about those hard times in marriage? Because we have all had them. I know from my own experiences, that the hard work you put in when you are going through those rough patches pays off ten fold later on. I won't be specific, but I do remember a time when Dan and I just weren't clicking, for whatever reason. We just were not getting along and things seemed to be going down hill, when my amazing man told me that it was my fault. This may sound pretty shocking to some, but it was the truth. I wasn't trying anymore. I didn't want to read scriptures, go to church, or say prayers anymore. I wasn't being supportive to him in his calling or his work, but all I was seeing at the time was me. Me. Me. Me. I wanted this and that and I was disappointed that I wasn't getting it. Me monster. After telling me this as politely as he could, I was pretty upset for quite some time, but after a lot of reflection and prayer, I realized he was totally right. I was giving maybe 30% to our relationship, while he was still giving 110%.

After all of that, we are stronger than ever. I think. He may have a different opinion, but since I'm the wife and the one writing this blog, I'm going to say stronger.

So, that is what I think of soul mates and true love. I can't imagine ever being with anyone other Dan. He gets me in a way no one else ever has, and I think that will just keep getting more and more true as time goes on. He is my very best friend. He is the person I can be completely me around without any judgement or awkwardness. Dan is the person I call when I am happy, sad, or anything in between. He is my soul mate. My one true love, because I chose him to be so. We work hard, everyday, to make sure that is still true everyday and I am so thankful for that. And, that is what my true love looks like, Ariel.

father's day and the exploding sink

Happy father's day to all the father's in my life!I cannot believe how blessed I am to have such amazing men in my life, and I owe a lot of who I am today to these wonderful men. Namely, my dad, my father-in-law, and of course my husband.

 

Today, overall, was pretty uneventful. We went to church and heard some great talks about fathers, then Dan got some cookies from the YW, and then we came home. For dinner, Dan grilled some yummy stakes and I made mashed potatoes (from scratch) and veggies. Everything was great and he loved all of his presents. And then something terrible happened.

The something terrible was this; while I was doing the dishes, the pipe under the sink came unlatched and filthy disgusting disposal water gushed forth and covered the entire kitchen floor. 

Scenario:

I am making chocolate muffins as a treat for Dan while he is out home teaching. Evie is playing on the floor and watching me. Once I am done with said muffins and they are safely in the oven, I turn my attention to the many dishes. As I am rinsing everything off and turning on the disposal, something snaps and a waterfall of brown disgusting water gushes out from underneath the sink and covers the whole kitchen in a matter of seconds. I immediately turn off the water and high tail it to get some towels. I get back just in time to see my poor daughter trying to crawl away from the mess and slipping and sliding all over the place. She was pretty unhappy about the whole situation. So, I throw all the towels I could find on the pool in my kitchen and run Evie upstairs for a much needed bath. Once she is down for the night, I go back downstairs and resume cleaning the stupid mess, and let me tell you, it was disgusting. By the time Dan got home from home teaching, I was in tears, on my knees in the kitchen, trying my best to mop up all the water. Not the best father's day present, but certainly memorable. The worst part is, those muffins were gross and totally not worth the effort.