Dan is in San Antonio, so I have been really busy... and really bored. I'll explain:
-Dan is my best friend, so when he's gone I don't have anyone to talk to or play with=bored
-Also when he's gone, I'm a single parent. And, let me tell you, it's hard=busy
-Doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day now that Evelyn is here and I'm alone=busy
-Because I'm alone with a new baby, I drove to Wichita and am spending some time with my parents, which is great because then I get to have some breaks from baby duty
-However, the down side to this is that there is nothing to do=bored
But, mostly I'm just trying to keep up with my little girl. Some days are better than others. On the good days she smiles and has pleasant play times before her naps, but the bad days are horrific. Those are the days that she's fussy ALL DAY LONG. Those are also the days that I pray for someone to come home soon so I can go for a drive or run some errands by myself. It's amazing the tole a day of crying can take on you. But, she's mostly good now that she has her acid reflux medicine. I spend my days holding Evelyn, watching movies, and reading books. Exciting right?
Today we have had exceptionally bad weather. They have been threatening us with tornadoes, floods, and thunderstorms all day long. Usually, this would scare me to death and send me running to the basement for the duration of the day, but today was different. The weather did make me extremely nervous because I have a crippling fear of tornadoes, but I found that most of my thoughts were about my little girl instead of being afraid for me. I kept thinking of the things I could grab for her in a moments notice, like blankets and my diaper bag, and what I would do if a tornado came our way; roll into a ball with her in the middle, in case you were wondering. My mom and dad wanted to hold her, but I found that I wasn't comfortable unless I was holding her and I would just hover in their general area until they gave her back. I have never felt so protective of anyone or anything is my whole life and the sensation took me completely by surprise. Do you ever get used to that? I love that little girl more than life itself and I would do anything to keep her safe. It's quite overwhelming. Thank you, tornadoes, for making me realize yet again how much this little one means to me.